In the famous words of Alexander Graham Bell, “When one door closes another opens. But often we look so long, so regretfully upon the closed door that we fail to see the one that has opened for us.”
Are you staring at a closed door and obsessing over it, only to be missing other opportunities in the meantime?
I recently found myself in this situation. Normally, I shake myself off and keep moving forward in life, looking and creating more opportunities but this one weighed heavily. I felt discouraged and disappointed about myself and the situation. But as bad as I was feeling, my thoughts about the situation was just fueling the fire within. Here’s the process I use, at these times, in order to move forward:
Name the feelings: I had to really think about what was bothering me about the situation and name each feeling one by one. At the time, I didn’t have a pen and paper handy, so I made a mental list of all of the emotions I was experiencing.
Analyze: Are the emotions based on facts or have you given what has happened a meaning based on your own perception, thoughts or self-doubt?
Look for the lessons or opportunities: Instead of dwelling on what isn’t, think of what is. What lessons can you take away and apply moving forward? In my case, I realized that I needed to learn to be more authentic and true to who I am. The door might be closed to that one opportunity but which ones are you now missing while pining away for that lost one?
Remember to think abundantly: There are always more opportunities, you just have to find them!